Conjured by o~ SeMeN SPeRmS ~o on December 24, 2012
There is a double dosage of bad news for men who like to watch a lot of porn on laptops resting on their groin area. You know who you are (and so do we).
Fox News has reported that an Italian andrologist, Carlo Foresta of Padua University, has conducted a study that found that resting a laptop on one’s groin for just one hour can raise the temperature of one’s testicles by two degrees Celsius (about four degrees Fahrenheit), overheating the genitals to the point that the owner’s ability to produce sperm could be impaired. Studies have further shown that even a one degree rise can lead to infertility, and that resting a laptop on the groin for more than two hours can result in having a child that looks like Joy Behar.
Whac-A-Mole seems like it could be endless fun.
Moles pop out of five holes in the arcade game and a soft mallet is used to force them back into the holes to score points.
Children and adults alike could whack the moles for hours at a time.
Or at least they could until a worker programmed a virus into the machines to make them shut down after a pre-determined number of plays, Holly Hill police said.
Now they have arrested that man, Marvin Walter Wimberly Jr., 61, of Orlando, who faces a charge of offenses against intellectual property.
It was all a scheme by Wimberly to insure job security, according to an arrest affidavit.
Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-OH) vowed Monday to eliminate net neutrality rules recently enacted by the Federal Communications Commission (FCC), referring to the regulations as a “government takeover of the Internet.”
“Right now, freedom and free expression are under attack by a power structure in Washington populated with regulators who have never set foot inside a radio station or a television studio,” Rep. Boehner said during a speech at the annual National Religious Broadcasters convention.
Evidence outlined in a Pentagon contractor report suggests that financial subversion carried out by unknown parties, such as terrorists or hostile nations, contributed to the 2008 economic crash by covertly using vulnerabilities in the U.S. financial system.
The unclassified 2009 report “Economic Warfare: Risks and Responses” by financial analyst Kevin D. Freeman, a copy of which was obtained by The Washington Times, states that “a three-phased attack was planned and is in the process against the United States economy.”
While economic analysts and a final report from the federal government’s Financial Crisis Inquiry Commission blame the crash on such economic factors as high-risk mortgage lending practices and poor federal regulation and supervision, the Pentagon contractor adds a new element: “outside forces,” a factor the commission did not examine.
The first text message said: “Mommy, I got buried.” About 40 minutes later: “Mommy, I can’t move my right hand.” Then, a brief call from New Zealand’s earthquake rubble to parents in the Philippines pleading to send help.
After another harrowing hour in a crumpled building, when she sent a half-dozen more texts about increasing pain, continued shaking and overwhelming smoke, came the final one: “Please make it quick.”
File under SeMeN SPeRmS Links 'o Death
Conjured by o~ SeMeN SPeRmS ~o on March 2, 2011