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Janky Lanx

1970-uncle-sam-i-want-out

The Rapper Who Cut His Penis Off And Jumped Off His Balcony May Make A Porno Now
uproxx.com/filmdrunk/2014…

Rugby Star Todd Carney Lost 3 Million Dollar Contract Because He Pissed In His Own Mouth #Bubbling
queerty.com/what-on-earth-…

Reptilian Shapeshifter Busted Live On Air?
beforeitsnews.com/strange/2014/0…

Conservatives Are Purposely Making Their Cars Spew Black Smoke To Protest Obama And Environmentalists #CoalRollers
businessinsider.com/conservatives-…

Report: Virtually All Food Imported Into U.S. Not Inspected By FDA
healthydebates.com/report-virtual…

University offers female students extra credit for not shaving their armpits
campusreform.org/?ID=5735

Burger King Goes Gay With ‘Gay Pride Whopper’ #Gaysploitation
usatoday.com/story/money/bu…

Worse than Bush: Poll finds more voters see Obama as the worst president in modern times
rawstory.com/rs/2014/07/02/…

The Biggest Diamond In The Known Universe Has Been Found, As Massive As The Sun
newyorker.com/online/blogs/e…

NYPD Cop-Turned-Demonologist on Why He Believes Possessions Are on the Rise
theblaze.com/stories/2014/0…

The tasteless history of the peeing Calvin decal

Archbishop Condemns Satanic ‘Black Mass’ at Okla. City Civic Center as ‘Sacrilegious’

Headbanging To Motorhead Causes Fan’s Brain To Bleed

Officer’s Conviction in Cannibalism Case Overturned
 

How Neuroscience Reinforces Racist Drug Policy

Berkeley To Force Marijuana Dispensaries To Provide Free Weed For Low-Income Patients

Autopsy finds high school senior died from caffeine overdose

Psychedelic mushrooms put your brain in a “waking dream,” study finds

Citrus Growers Manufacture Huge Amounts of DMT

10 Anti-Drug Ads That Make You Want to Take Drugs

Anti-rape jeans and bra: Indian college girls invent range of security gear

Study: Fish Feel Pain, Recognize Individuals Like Mammals, Can Pass On “Cultural Traditions”

File under SeMeN SPeRmS BLArRrG, SeMeN SPeRmS Links 'o Death

Bigg Nuttz

✪ E.F.A.: COMPLETE ‘VILLAGE VOICE MEDIA’ INTERVIEW WITH E.F.A. MEMBERS
My main reason for doing this interview is as a member of E.F.A., whose main tenet is “Equality For All”, meaning all creatures. This means that we have many activities and aims (visit www.equalityforall.net for details) including supporting “extreme” expressions of inter-species love. By “extreme” I mean including sexual expressions, but we have absolutely no tolerance for forced sexual interaction with any species, or inflicting pain of any sort. In that sense I support zoophilia with any animal – if done sensitively and painlessly.
✪ Family man Ben Affleck shows off his wild side by proudly displaying his tough guy tattoo…of a dolphin
The actor has body art in the form of a dolphin just below his right hip, perilously close to his bottom. He allegedly opted for the dolphin to cover up an ex-high school girlfriend’s name.
✪ Terminator-style contact lenses will keep you up to date with news
Imagine catching up with your texts, social networking and perhaps the news without having to log on to a computer or even glance at a smartphone. Messages and images would simply appear in front of your eyes, generated by a computerised contact lens. Of course, you may not always want to be bothered by such messages if you are doing anything so quaint as – for instance – reading a book or going out walking and enjoying the scenery. But until now the concept of info-vision – the ability to stream information across a person’s field of vision – had belonged to the realms of science fiction, featuring in films such as the Terminator series or TV shows such as Torchwood. However, scientists have developed a prototype lens that could one day provide the wearer with all kinds of hands-free information. It could also be used to display directions and TV programmes.
✪ Chemistry professor links feces and caffeine
Researchers led by Prof. Sébastien Sauvé of the University of Montreal’s Department of Chemistry have discovered that traces of caffeine are a useful indicator of the contamination of our water by sewers. “E coli bacteria is commonly used to evaluate and regulate the levels of fecal pollution of our water from storm water discharge, but because storm sewers systems collect surface runoff, non-human sources can contribute significantly to the levels that are observed,” Sauvé explained. “Our study has determined that there is a strong correlation between the levels of caffeine in water and the level of bacteria, and that chemists can therefore use caffeine levels as an indicator of pollution due to sewerage systems.”
✪ Legalization debate: first pot, now coke?
Legalization used to be the rallying cry of stoners alone. Not anymore. In Latin America, leaders seem to be reaching a new consensus about the drug war: it has failed, and it’s time for a new solution. Most say that foreign demand for cocaine and marijuana is the underlying problem. If American, Europeans and others stopped buying the drugs, the vast black-market for the trade wouldn’t exist. The drug traffickers wouldn’t be able to charge huge profits, and they wouldn’t be able to afford the massive weaponry and build the network of informants, enforcers, dealers and mules that allow them to sustain their production and distribution supply chain. But you can’t exactly presto demand away. Unless, the reasoning goes, you just legalize the drugs. Sell them over the counter for a reasonable price. Undercut the illegal market. Give the farmers who grow the stuff good jobs, free of fear, and give governments a share in the drug profits by taxing them.
✪ Opportunity in the Adderall Drought
Drug-dealing does not come naturally to me. But gradually, the opportunity created by the ongoing shortage of Adderall IR (and its generic equivalents) gets impossible to ignore. Strict limits govern the supply of the drug’s ingredients (chiefly, amphetamine), and a number of manufacturers have already hit their caps—a reality of which I’m made aware after trying a dozen city pharmacies and learning they’ll be sold out until next year. I finally track down some at the Hoboken Family Pharmacy and pay $155 for 120 tablets. On the PATH train back, I ponder my good fortune in finding a pharmacy with the drug available, and in being so overprescribed. The blue pills in my pocket practically scream, “Sell me!”
✪ The Young and the Lazy
Though the Bible says that rich people getting into heaven is as likely as squeezing a 1500-pound mammal through a tiny hole, it’s worth noting that the vast majority of billionaires made their fortunes from scratch. It’s also worth noting how unbelievably lazy today’s kids can be. I’ve been hiring twenty-somethings for about twenty years now, and though they are getting more tech-savvy, their productivity keeps plummeting. I believe this is due to their snowballing sense of entitlement. Here are ten lessons I’ve learned after watching kids in their early twenties acting hyper-entitled
✪ Man details sexual relationship with dolphin in book ‘Wet Goddess’
MB: She began raking her teeth lightly against my arms and legs which was indescribably erotic. Some might find it frightening, I found it erotic. DF: Now in your book, you talk about how that led on to you two having sex. A lot of people would say that’s wrong, what’s right in your mind about what you did? MB: What was right with it is that the dolphin initiated the whole sexual thing. As I mentioned, she was in isolation – she’d be using me to satisfy her sexual needs.
✪ Sleazy Aussie Landlord Caught Hiding In Air Vent To Spy On Naked Tenants
A sleazy 75-year-old Australian landlord was caught lurking in an air vent with a camera — filming his young tenants having sex, the Manly Daily reported Thursday. Bruno Silvolli, of Narrabeen in Sydney, also cut holes in the bathroom wall of his tenants’ apartment so he could spy on those inside. The married man is due for sentencing in January after pleading guilty in the Manly Court to several counts of filming and watching without consent, as well as indecently assaulting a female tenant. He first came to police attention last year when a young couple, who were renting the apartment below Silvolli’s home, reported the old man had groped the woman’s breast while she hung washing out and later exposed himself.
✪ Las Vegas man with 100-pound scrotum seeks $1 million for surgery
It sat in front of him, on top of a pillow that rested on a milk crate. He sprinkled baby powder on it — what looked like a huge watermelon encased in a compression bandage — but the unmistakable smell of urine couldn’t be completely smothered. “Hard to believe, isn’t it?” 47-year-old Wesley Warren Jr. said in the poorly lit apartment. “It’s freakish.” What sat in front of where Warren was seated in shorts — what is actually attached to him — was more than 100 pounds of scrotum, the protective sac of skin and muscle that contains his testicles.
✪ Sex with animals linked to penis cancer
Micro-injuries to the penis are a well-recognized risk factor for the development of penile cancer. Such physical trauma could explain how sex with animals causes the cancer. “We think that the intense and long-term SWA practice could produce micro-traumas in the human penile tissue,” Zequi said. “The genital mucus membranes of animals could have different characteristics from human genitalia, and the animals’ secretions are probably different from human fluids. Perhaps animal tissues are less soft than ours, and non-human secretions would be toxic for us,” he explained.
✪ Young drug users turn to ‘bubble’ for a cheap high
An increasing number of young adults were found to be buying a drug they refer to as “bubble”, once a street name for mephedrone but now a term for any white powder. Users are uncertain about what they are taking and any potential health risks. “We found that one in 10 of the young adults questioned had taken mephedrone within the past year and one in 20 within the past month,” said Dr Fiona Measham, who led the study. “In the case of the next generation of ‘legal highs’, no clear substitute for mephedrone has emerged. Instead, there was uncertainty, confusion and a degree of disinterest. In this vacuum, bubble has emerged and evolved as a generic term used in the north of England to refer to any unknown white powders which are synthetic stimulants.” Thanks Cat
✪ Rock Fan Kills Himself After Concert Left Him With Tinnitus
A British rock music fan stabbed himself to death after a night out watching U.S. band Them Crooked Vultures left him with severe tinnitus, a coroner’s investigation reported. Robert McIndoe, 52, was unable to sleep for three months after seeing the band – made up of former band members from Led Zeppelin, Foo Fighters and Queens of the Stone Age – at the Brixton Academy, south London. His psychiatrist, Dr. Helen Stinson, said, “He accepted death as a side-effect of stopping the noise,” the Daily Mirror reported Friday. The inquest heard he tried to commit suicide by taking an overdose at his home in south London in the same month that he fatally stabbed himself. McIndoe’s wife Shirley said, “He just wanted not to be suffering.”
✪ Joey Skaggs: World’s Largest Bra Record Should Be Mine (PHOTOS)
Back in 1969, Joey Skaggs, a famed conceptual artist and media prankster, created a bra that was reportedly 120 feet long — 50 feet for the cups alone — as a statement about America’s fixation on breasts.
✪ Miley Cyrus Admits She’s A Huge Stoner [VIDEO]
Here’s video of her at her 19th birthday party talking about her Bob Marley cake and how she smokes “way too much fucking weed.”

 

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File under Music, SeMeN SPeRmS BLArRrG, SeMeN SPeRmS Links 'o Death, Sex

Conjured by SeMeN SPeRmS on November 28, 2011

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sdrawkcaB tI yalP

  • Chicks with Steve Buscemi’s eyes
  • The dimension in question is not penis or testicle size, but a measurement known as anogenital distance, or AGD.

    Men whose AGD is shorter than the median length — around 2 inches (52 mm) — have seven times the chance of being sub-fertile as those with a longer AGD, according to a study published on Friday in the journal Environmental Health Perspectives.

    That distance, measured from the anus to the underside of the scrotum, is linked to male fertility, including semen volume and sperm count, the study found. The shorter the AGD, the more likely a man was to have a low sperm count.

  • During the tests, Northrop’s laser was installed on the Navy’s USS Paul Foster, a self-defense test ship.

    In initial tests, the so-called Maritime Laser Demonstrator tracked and
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    lased land targets.

    The laser system then tracked and attacked moving, unmanned boats that were remotely piloted at various speeds and distances from the ship.

    The Northrop device represents the first electric laser weapon to be fired from a moving platform at sea, Northrop said.

  • Milk from Little Rock and drinking water from Philadelphia contained the highest levels of Iodine-131 from Japan yet detected by the Environmental Protection Agency, according to data released by EPA Saturday.

    The Philadelphia sample is below the EPA’s maximum contaminant level (MCL) for iodine-131, but the Little Rock sample is almost three times higher.

    Nonetheless, the EPA does not consider the milk dangerous because the MCL is set for long-term exposure, and the iodine-131 from Japan’s Fukushima-Daichi nuclear accident is expected to be temporary and deteriorate rapidly.

    The EPA’s MCL for iodine-131 is 3 picoCuries per liter.

    The Little Rock milk sample contained 8.9 picoCuries per liter. It was collected on March 30.

  • “As long as the $1.2-trillion annual budget for the military-security complex is off limits (to cutting), nothing can be done about the US budget deficit except to renege on obligations to the elderly, confiscate private assets or print enough money to inflate away all debts,” Paul Craig Roberts, former Assistant Treasury Secretary under President Reagan warns.

    In an article titled “Stealing from Social Security to Pay for Wars and Bailouts,” published in the April issue of the “Rock Creek Free Press” of Washington, D.C., Roberts says that Republicans are calling Social Security and Medicare “entitlements”—making them sound like welfare—when, in fact, workers over their lifetimes have contributed 15 percent of all their earnings to the payroll tax that funds these benefits and have every right to them.

  • Japan’s Meteorological Agency on Friday warned the country’s 20 volcanoes has become alive due to the massive March 11 earthquake, and a study said earthquake over 9.0-magnitude might hit Japan.
    The Agency said volcanic explosion occurred after earthquake several times in history and people should maintain vigilance against this tendency.
  • 3 year old girl scream-core “Don’t brush my Hair! it’s in knots!”
  • Dead dolphins are washed up on the Gulf Coast in record numbers and the toll has breached 400 in just one year, even as Federal authorities are trying to put a lid on actual numbers and the reasons for unusual deaths.

    CNN reported on Friday that 406 dolphins were found either stranded or dead on the Gulf Coast between February 2010 and April 2011. It has been widely thought that the dolphin deaths, and the death and stranding of other marine mammal population, have been the result of BP’s oil spill last year, an accident in which millions of liters of oil gushed into the sea.

  • 2011 March 31st around 12 o’clock noon, a completely naked woman suffering from mental illness climbed to the top of a high-voltage electricity tower near the Tanggudongjiang Road and 9th Avenue intersection, was shocked onto a strut nearly 20 meters above the ground, the voltage of the high-voltage tower reaching 220,000 volts, hung in midair having been injured by the high-voltage electricity, not fully conscious.
  • In the memo, whose subject line is ‘Flying Saucers’, Agent Hottel reveals that an Air Force investigator had stated that ‘three so-called flying saucers had been recovered in New Mexico’.
    Agent Hottel went on to write: ‘They were described as being circular in shape with raised centers, approximately 50 feet in diameter.
    ‘Each one was occupied by three bodies of human shape but only 3 feet tall,’ he stated.
    The bodies were ‘dressed in a metallic cloth of a very fine texture. Each body was bandaged in a manner similar to the blackout suits used by speed flyers and test pilots.’ He said that the informant, whose identity was censored in the memo, claimed the saucers had been found in New Mexico ‘due to the fact that the Government has a very high-powered radar set-up in that area and it is believed the radar interferes with teh controlling mechanism of the saucers’.

  • Three-dimensional visualization reconstructed from scanned human data. Lateral view of cunnilingus, or oral sex performed on a woman.

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The Monkeyshines Will Drive You Wild

  • Sure it looks like a dubious model of a hummingbird which would be at home on a shelf at your granny’s house – but this is actually a $4million spy drone.

    The mini spy plane has been developed by a major Pentagon contractor over a period of five years and is said to contain revolutionary new technology.

    Called a ‘Nano Hummingbird’ the two-wing, flapping aircraft is capable of climbing and descending vertically, and flying sideways left and right.

  • Worried that they’re out to get you? Tinfoil hats just aren’t cutting it any more? A new system designed to reveal when microphones, cameras and other sensors are recording could reassure those who are paranoid about their privacy.
  • It’s a grisly and mysterious effort: Japan today began excavations at a former army medical school—in the search for human remains linked to the military’s shadowy Unit 731. It ran a notorious World War II program that allegedly conducted live experiments on foreign prisoners of war, most of them Chinese. It reportedly injected them with typhus, cholera, and other diseases as part of the country’s research into germ warfare, and reportedly performed vivisections and freezing prisoners to death in endurance tests.
  • A Georgia resident has been an organic farmer for years, but now faces $5000 dollars in fines for growing too many vegetables on his land. That’s right.
  • No-one likes having their cinema experience ruined someone noisily munching on popcorn when they’re trying to watch a movie.

    But most of us simply tut at the eating offender and carry on. Not so in Latvia, where a man has been shot dead after a popcorn-based argument.

  • At a plastic surgery clinic in Upper Manhattan that caters to Dominicans, one of the most popular procedures is an operation to lift women’s buttocks, because — as the doctor explains — “they all like the curve.”

    In Flushing, Queens, surgeons have their attention trained a few feet higher, on upturned noses that their Chinese patients want flipped down. Russian women in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, are having their breasts enlarged, while Koreans in Chinatown are having jaw lines slimmed.

  • Scientists at the Institute of Marine Mammal Studies are investigating unusually high numbers of stillborn and aborted dolphins in the Gulf of Mexico region. Seventeen infant dolphins have washed up on shore so far this year, compared to an average of one or two a month, says one scientist.
  • Family members smuggled pot to the miners in their letters, and small groups of the miners would sneak off to smoke it, leaving others out of the loop.

    They “never even offered me one,” miner Samuel Avalos is quoted.

    The drugs, instead of promoting camaraderie, were divisive to group morale, officials thought, and they considering using drug sniffing dogs to intercept the shipments.

    Then of course, there was the absence of their regular sexual partners, and the miners were soon requesting some help in that department so doctors worked on how to appease the men’s sexual desire.

    Pornography and pinups were sent down, and at one point, a donor offered to send 10 inflatable sex dolls to the trapped men. But that idea was shot down.

  • Would-be NFL prospects taking part in training camp seemed surprisingly relaxed when being told that a gorilla had escaped from a near-by zoo.

    That was, until the ‘gorilla’ ran out of the bushes and towards them – leaving the American Football players scurrying away screaming like little girls.

  • According to Anonymous, Westboro Baptist Church was behind the Open Letter allegedly from Anonymous, and then added fuel to the flames with WBC’s “Bring it” reply. Anonymous warns don’t DDoS, it’s a trap to collect IPs for suing.
  • Incredible video has surfaced after a news crew from local Fox station KTXL was attacked and beaten in Natomas, California on Sunday. The crew included a male reporter and a female videographer. Both were repeatedly struck, with the woman being pulled to the ground by her hair and kicked in the face. They were trying to cover reaction to a recent murder.
    Incredible video has surfaced after a news crew from local Fox station KTXL was attacked and beaten in Natomas, California on Sunday. The crew included a male reporter and a female videographer. Both were repeatedly struck, with the woman being pulled to the ground by her hair and kicked in the face. They were trying to cover reaction to a recent murder.
  • The suit says Warren “began making overly suggestive comments” to Colombo toward the end of her son’s freshman year at Clifton High. “Specifically, Warren stated to Plaintiff that ‘if you let me suck your breasts, then I will make sure B.C. is not accused of doing anything wrong and I will help him if he gets into trouble,’ or words to that effect.”
  • The documentary, made in the style of a Soviet propaganda film, said “rock music originated from African hunting rituals” and “rap was originated by inmates in prisons, that’s why rap singers wear wide and long trousers”.

    “This satanic music was created by evil forces to bring youth in Western countries to total moral degradation,” according to the documentary.

  • First off, the crux of the story is that a guy named Dennis Montgomery seems to have concocted an elaborate con on the US government that worked for years. He created some software, supposedly originally designed to help colorize movies, but it was later pitched for its capability to (I’m not joking) read coded messages in the “crawl bar” on Al Jazeera which (it was claimed) provided clues to planned terrorist attacks. Various US government agencies basically kept handing over millions and millions of dollars to Mr. Montgomery and partners. Some of those former partners now admit that Montgomery’s technology was a hoax, and his presentations included doctored videos and test results.
  • Recently, a man riding a motorcycle near a Beijing PetroChina gas station was involved in an accident, his backpack was carrying a large amount of 100 yuan bills, and as a result….

    A gas station attendant risked his life to protect the cash, but a crowd scrambled around him.

  • An American jailed in Pakistan for the fatal shooting of two armed men was secretly working for the CIA and scouting a neighborhood when he was arrested, a disclosure likely to further frustrate U.S. government efforts to free the man and strain relations between two countries partnered in a fragile alliance in the war on terror.
  • The Simpsons’ dry, absurdist wit has clear roots in this short film directed and starring Matt Groening’s father, Homer Groening.
    Thanks Smartender.
  • I am pleased to preview ‘Dead Drops’ a new project which I started off as part of my ongoing EYEBEAM residency in NYC the last couple weeks. ‘Dead Drops’ is an anonymous, offline, peer to peer file-sharing network in public space. I am ‘injecting’ USB flash drives into walls, buildings and curbs accessable to anybody in public space. You are invited to go to these places (so far 5 in NYC) to drop or find files on a dead drop. Plug your laptop to a wall, house or pole to share your favorite files and data. Each dead drop contains a readme.txt file explaining the project. ‘Dead Drops’ is still in progress, to be continued here and in more cities. Full documentation, movie, map and ‘How to make your own dead drop’ manual coming soon! Stay tuned.
  • The drug known as ecstasy has been used by 12 million people in the United States alone and millions more worldwide. Past research has suggested that ecstasy users perform worse than nonusers on some tests of mental ability. But there are concerns that the methods used to conduct that research were flawed, and the experiments overstated the cognitive differences between ecstasy users and nonusers.

    In response to those concerns, a team of researchers has conducted one of the largest studies ever undertaken to re-examine the cognitive effects of ecstasy, funded by a $1.8 million grant from the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) and published today in the journal Addiction. The study was specifically designed to minimize the methodological limitations of earlier research.

    In contrast to many prior studies, ecstasy users in the new study showed no signs of cognitive impairment attributable to drug use: ecstasy use did not decrease mental ability.

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Get It (F)In!

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