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GROUFF…AUGRRR!

Goin Apeshit

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The Other Side of Otters

A weaned harbor seal pup was resting onshore when an untagged male sea otter approached it, grasped it with its teeth and forepaws, bit it on the nose, and flipped it over. The harbor seal moved toward the water with the sea otter following closely. Once in the water, the sea otter gripped the harbor seal’s head with its forepaws and repeatedly bit it on the nose, causing a deep laceration. The sea otter and pup rolled violently in the water for approximately 15 min, while the pup struggled to free itself from the sea otter’s grasp. Finally, the sea otter positioned itself dorsal to the pup’s smaller body while grasping it by the head and holding it underwater in a position typical of mating sea otters. As the sea otter thrust his pelvis, his penis was extruded and intromission was observed. At 105 min into the encounter, the sea otter released the pup, now dead, and began grooming. Thanks Jasmine.
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5 Outrageous Revelations from Matt Taibbi’s Takedown on HSBC’s Drug Money Laundering
Matt Taibbi’s most recent Rolling Stonearticle unpacks one of last year’s most shocking bank cases in our era of “Too Big to Jail.” In December, HSBC was punished with a $1.9 billion settlement on drug laundering charges, the largest in American history, yet only five weeks worth of profits for the world’s third largest bank. U.S. Assistant Attorney Lanny Breuer was uncharacteristically candid when explaining why he refused to pursue criminal charges: “HSBC would almost certainly have lost its banking license in the U.S., the future of the institution would have been under threat and the entire banking system would have been destabilized.” People were rightfully outraged when not a single HSBC banker went to jail for a decades’ worth of federal crimes, including money-laundering linked to drug cartels, terrorists and oppressive regimes. Taibbi dove deep into HSBC’s case and history, revealing that the bank’s crimes were even worst than we thought.
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How the seven dwarfs of Auschwitz fell under the spell of Dr Death: The hideous experiments carried out by Nazi Josef Mengele on seven trusting brothers and sisters

An SS officer strode over and established they were all siblings from the Ovitz family. Immediately, the order went out: Wake the doctor! It was nearly midnight on Friday, May 19, 1944, and Dr Josef Mengele was asleep in his quarters. All the troopers on duty, however, were well aware of his passion for collecting human ‘freaks’, including hermaphrodites and giants. A lone dwarf wouldn’t have been sufficient reason to disturb his sleep, but a family — and seven of them — why, it was just like the fairy tale!
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Social media – the new addiction

Social media addiction has become an official condition. A clinic in London is treating more than 100 sufferers a year, with a professional footballer among those receiving counseling. A study last year by the University of Chicago suggested sites like Facebook are more addictive that alcohol and cigarettes.
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The Pentagon’s Budget Crunch: No Dissenting Views

We’ve noted many times that when it comes to corporate media coverage of the so-called budget “sequester”–the immediate cuts to military and social spending set to hit in a matter of weeks–what matters most is what will happen to the military. The Washington Post had a whole piece (2/13/13) devoted to yet another round of complaints from military leaders–without a single comment from anyone who might take the view that cutting military spending would not be such a disaster.
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Fugitive gunman Chris Dorner told hostage couple: I just want to clear my name

At around midday on Tuesday, the couple arrived to clean the house and found Dorner in an upstairs sitting room. His gun drawn, the suspect ordered them to stay calm. Mrs Reynolds ran down the stairs in a bid to escape, but Dorner caught her. He took the couple to a bedroom, where he made them lie on the floor, then bound their limbs with plastic zip-locks, gagged them with towels and covered their heads with pillowcases. “I thought we were dead,” Mr Reynolds said. The gunman repeatedly insisted, however, that he would not kill them. He revealed he had watched Mr Reynolds shovelling snow around the property in the preceding days, and told the couple he believed they were “hard-working, good people,” saying: “I don’t have a problem with you. I just want to clear my name.”
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Parent says West Sabine staff out of line after feces found

“My kid came home and he said, he told me that he had been inspected, his butt had been inspected at the elementary school for feces,” Little said. “And I asked him, I got to ask him about it and he said he was embarrassed by the whole situation.” Feces had been found on the gym floor at least five times during or after PE Class. It first happened last year only with this particular class of children, said principal Deborah Lane. Lane says she asked the children numerous times who was responsible. She even gave them lectures on germs and the dangers of e-coli. This last time, she requested the school nurse search for feces in the Tiger cubs’ pants. Accounts of how the search was conducted differ. “The school nurse basically pulled their pants out or down.”
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Facebook Paid No Income Taxes in 2012: Report

Facebook didn’t pay any federal or state income taxes last year and will receive a hefty tax refund, according to a recent report. How did the social network manage to swing such a nice tax break? Well, according to the Citizen for Tax Justice report the company benefited from the tax deductability of executive stock options, which reduced all of its income taxes by $1.03 billion in 2012. The company also has another $2.17 billion in extra tax-option breaks to carry forward in the future, according to the report, which means Facebook gets to deduct a total of more than $3 billion in current and future taxes, according to the report.
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Welcome to the Malware-Industrial Complex

One reason is that a freshly discovered weakness in a popular piece of software, known in the trade as a “zero-day” vulnerability because the software makers have had no time to develop a fix, can be cashed in for much more than a reputation boost and some free drinks at the bar. Information about such flaws can command prices in the hundreds of thousands of dollars from defense contractors, security agencies and governments. This trade in zero-day exploits is poorly documented, but it is perhaps the most visible part of a new industry that in the years to come is likely to swallow growing portions of the U.S. national defense budget, reshape international relations, and perhaps make the Web less safe for everyone. Zero-day exploits are valuable because they can be used to sneak software onto a computer system without detection by conventional computer security measures, such as antivirus packages or firewalls. Criminals might do that to intercept credit card numbers. An intellige…
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Moshpit Simulator

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Why we all think we’re so great

On a scale of one to 10, you probably think you’re a seven. And you wouldn’t be alone. While it’s impossible for most people to be above the median for a specific quality, people think they are better than most people in many arenas, from charitable behavior to work performance. The phenomenon, known as illusory superiority, is so stubbornly persistent that psychologists would be surprised if it didn’t show up in their studies, said David Dunning, a psychologist at Cornell who has studied the effect for decades. It happens for many reasons: Others are too polite to say what they really think, incompetent people lack the skills to assess their abilities accurately, and such self-delusions can actually protect people’s mental health, Dunning told LiveScience. Since psychological studies first began, people have given themselves top marks for most positive traits. While most people do well at assessing others, they are wildly positive about their own abilities, Dunning said.
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Drug-Dealing Mother Left Children Alone to Go to Store, Officer Observed Child Playing with Crack Rock

When the woman Tiffany Stanton Johnson, 25, arrived home and spoke to an officer on the scene, she stated that she had left her three children home alone to go shopping at Kmart. While speaking to the woman, the officer allegedly saw her son behind her playing with a crack rock, according to the complaint. At this, Johnson was forced to admit that she sells crack cocaine. After giving a consent search, the officer found a can with 12 grams of crack cocaine packaged for sale.
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The seas you’re in: fish urine contributes nutrients to coastal waters

“A funny comparison is if you take the biggest ungulate herd — so that would be bison, antelope, deer and elk — in Yellow Stone National Park, per meter squared — so per unit area — the fish on one of the reefs that I look at…they actually pee more than three times more [than that herd],” he said. Fish urine even dwarfs fertilizer-heavy golf course runoff — per meter squared — in nutrient content. Luke Joseph, a freshman biology major from Augusta, said he wouldn’t have guessed fish pee had so much to do with nutrient cycling. “That’s pretty cool,” he said. “I guess that means aquaponics might be a good way to grow things.”
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‘Blue Fairy’ Arrested in New York Drug Bust

Turk appears in a YouTube video by White Trash Clan titled “My World is Blue” dancing in a blue tutu and fairy wings and carrying a wand. She blows pixie dust at the camera and mimes drug use. The video, posted in July 2012, shows people dancing in parking lots and pharmacies with giant cutouts of blue pills and rhapsodizing about prescription drug abuse: “I can stop when I want to / I’m not addicted / I don’t take pills / crush and sniff it / Blue is my world in this life how I live it / Come out to Staten Island, pay a little visit.”
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The unsexy truth about dopamine

If there were a celebrity among brain chemicals, it would be dopamine. Supposedly released whenever we experience something pleasurable, it’s forever linked to salacious stories of sex, drugs and wild partying in the popular press. The Kim Kardashian of neurotransmitters, it gives instant appeal to listless reporting and gives editors an excuse to drop some booty on the science pages. There are too many bad examples to mention in detail, but I have some favourites. The Sun declared that “cupcakes could be as addictive as cocaine” because they apparently cause “a surge of the reward chemical dopamine to hit the decision-making area of the brain”. The article was topped off with a picture of Katy Perry, apparently a “cupcake fan” and, presumably, dangerously close to spiralling into a life of frosted-sponge addiction.
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Iceland considers pornography ban

The government is considering introducing internet filters, such as those used to block China off form the worldwide web, in order to stop Icelanders downloading or viewing pornography on the internet. The unprecedented censorship is justified by fears about damaging effects of the internet on children and women. Ogmundur Jonasson, Iceland’s interior minister, is drafting legislation to stop the access of online pornographic images and videos by young people through computers, games consoles and smartphones. “We have to be able to discuss a ban on violent pornography, which we all agree has a very harmful effects on young people and can have a clear link to incidences of violent crime,” he said.
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Syphilis: A Love Story

Miss Sanborn tells us that an eccentric gentleman, having taken a fancy to see a large party of noseless persons, invited every one thus afflicted, whom he met in the streets, to dine on a certain day at a tavern, where he formed them into a brotherhood.
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zyalt: Взрыв метеорита в небе над Уралом… Вся информация в одном посте.

Russian Meteorite Pictures & Video
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Dorion Sagan on the first ejaculation in the history of the world

Since sex usually occurs in water, it doesn’t tend to preserve well. But in one four-hundred-million-year-old silica-rich deposit local changes in pH remobilized some of the silica, leaving behind thin films of the original organic material. In the specimen the chert beautifully preserved the plant’s delicate archegonium (from goni, Hindi for ‘sack,’ akin to yoni, Sanskrit for ‘vagina’) — the female sex organ. Another sample of rock, sliced thin and observed with a microscope, shows Aglaphyton’s antheridium, its male sex organ — filled with sperm cells ready to explode. Here, preserved by chance, with neither compromised actors nor moral qualm, is a geographic equivalent of the ‘money shot’ of pornographic films — an ejaculation event 140,000 times older than Homer’s Odyssey, 400 times older than the human species, and almost as old as the appearance of animals in the fossil record.
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Digital Deception – Can You Trust What You See?

Does this make you wonder how much footage from prominent world events is actually digitally created to assist in advancing a dark agenda? How much fake news are we being fed? Dictators, terrorists, riots, revolution beamed into our living rooms as part of on-going psychological warfare against the masses? Is this a conventional war of tanks and guns and bombs in Afghanistan, Iraq and Libya or is it really all part of a sustained psychological war on the minds of every single person on the planet who watches television? Our advise? Stop watching mass media news. There’s nothing good for us there!
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The Hammer: A Muscle-Controlled, Light-Up Dildo

I’m proud to present my latest creation: The Hammer! The Hammer is a prototype test-your-strength game that’s an insertable, muscle-controlled, light-up dildo.
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Coming and Going on Facebook

We asked the 61% of Facebook users who have taken a break from using the site to tell us in their own words why they did so, and they mentioned a variety of reasons. The largest group (21%) said that their “Facebook vacation” was a result of being too busy with other demands or not having time to spend on the site. Others pointed toward a general lack of interest in the site itself (10% mentioned this in one way or another), an absence of compelling content (10%), excessive gossip or “drama” from their friends (9%), or concerns that they were spending too much time on the site and needed to take a break (8%).
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Why Facebook is bad and you should consider deleting your account

Learn why your favorite social network – Facebook – is actually bad. All the political and technical reasons you need to understand why you should consider deleting your Facebook account and how to do it.
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On leaving Facebook

Facebook has shown no respect for its users privacy. The site notoriously makes it difficult to understand who you are sharing what with, and has been known to reset privacy settings to defaults without notifying users. Defaults which share everything. Facebook tracks your usage of the web and knows pretty much everything else about your life. Facebook supports CISPA, and why wouldn’t they? It gives them a free pass to give your data to anyone. SOPA and PIPA didn’t. A service that knows everything about you, even things you don’t want it to, supports legislation that would allow it to give anyone that information without recourse – sounds great doesn’t it?
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Singer Chubby Checker sues HP over penis-measuring app

“This lawsuit is about preserving the integrity and legacy of a man who has spent years working hard at his musical craft and has earned the position of one of the greatest musical entertainers of all time,” said Gary. “We cannot sit idly and watch as technology giants or anyone else exploits the name or likeness of an innocent person with the goal of making millions of dollars,” he added. “The defendants have marketed Chubby Checker’s name on their product to gain a profit and this just isn’t right.” The “Chubby Checker” app, which appears on websites for Palm devices, claims to allow a person to determine a man’s penis size by using his shoe size.
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Suspected meth lab turns out to be sweet maple syrup

“I think my neighbors on their way to church see the buckets and stuff and think we’ve got a meth lab operation going on here. I just want to put their minds at ease, and let them know it’s maple syrup. And that they’re all welcome for pancakes if they want to come on over.”
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File under Music, SeMeN SPeRmS BLArRrG, SeMeN SPeRmS Links 'o Death, Sex

Conjured by o~ SeMeN SPeRmS ~o on February 16, 2013

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Mayday! Mayday! SNAFU!

  • Regarding Mario’s origins, it’s common knowledge among game fans that legendary game designer Shigeru Miyamoto created him for 1981′s Donkey Kong arcade game. But few know that Nintendo borrowed Mario’s name and Italian heritage from a real man. That man’s name is Mario Segale, and he’s not a plumber. He’s a wealthy real estate developer in Tukwila, Washington. Segale unwittingly stepped into video game history by renting out a warehouse that served as Nintendo’s U.S. headquarters in the early 1980s. At that time, a financially struggling Nintendo of America (NOA) was preparing the U.S. launch of Donkey Kong. Legend has it that NOA President Minoru Arakawa noticed physical similarities between Donkey Kong’s short, dark-haired protagonist and the landlord. So the crew at NOA nicknamed the character Mario, and it stuck.
  • GM CEO Ed Whitacre announced in a Wall Street Journal column Wednesday that his company has paid back its government bailout loan “in full, with interest, years ahead of schedule.” He is even running TV ads on all major networks to that effect–a needless expense given that a credulous media is only too happy to parrot his claims for free. Detroit Free Press’ Mike Thompson, for example, advises bailout proponents to start “warming up their vocal chords” to jeer their opponents with chants of “I told you so.” But before belting out their victory aria, GM-boosters ought to hear the whole story–not just the fairytale version about Government Motors’ grand comeback that Mr. Whitacre is feeding them.
  • COCKPIT VOICE RECORDINGS, TRANSCRIPTS, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL TAPES
  • As a result, despite what advertisers claim, most orange juice is neither fresh nor natural not in the way mAs a result, despite what advertisers claim, most orange juice is neither fresh nor natural (not in the way most of us would define those terms). Think about it; how could it be truly fresh year-round, when oranges are a seasonal product? Sure, it may be “not from concentrate,” but raw juice is often heated, stripped of its volatile compounds and flavor-rich oils, and stored for as long as a year before it reaches the consumer. Something called “the flavor pack” is used to return most of the “natural” aroma and taste to the product, Hamilton explains:
    The flavor is sourced from all parts of oranges everywhere…Typically, the orange oils and essences that juice concentrators collect during evaporation are sold to flavor manufacturers, who then reconfigure these by-products…into ‘flavor packs’ for reintroduction into orange juice.
  • I am white. I know that’s a terribly big surprise, considering that I write a blog called Stuff White People Like, but I mean it, I’m white. Like really white. I’m not attempting to assert some sort of superiority through my whiteness; quite the opposite actually. Thanks to my liberal upbringing, I am imbued with the appropriate amount of guilt and shame about my ancestors and their actions in the New World.
  • “I remember seeing this beautiful airbrushed photo of Chi Chi Rodriguez, with his head over a golf ball, and it kind of mimicked an astronaut’s head in front of the moon. But it was this golfer’s head over a golf ball, and they used that logo on a line of products that were manufactured in China. So I bought it, ’cause it was the cheapest thing you could buy, golf tees with a little hanging bag, with Chi Chi Rodriguez’s head in front of a golf ball. And we later ended up using that as the inspiration for our first album cover.”
  • Wildlife experts in Kerala are hunting a rogue bull elephant who is thought to have gored 12 female tuskers to death because they spurned his sexual advances.
  • At 7.17 a.m. on 30th June, 1908, travellers on the Transsiberian Railway and other witnesses saw an enormous bolide cross the sky in a SSE to NNW direction, leaving behind it a thick and persistent trail which hung in the atmosphere like a pall Immediately after the object disappeared from view the flash of an explosion was observed on the horizon and a gigantic pillar of smoke rose high in the air where it remained for a considerable time before dispersing. Several detonations were heard, although the exact number is uncertain due to conflicting stories from different witnesses. These persons also gave varying details of the final fireball, the duration of which is hence in considerable doubt.
  • Whilst working at Universal Studios in the 1940’s, Lon Chaney Jr. befriended a German Shepherd named ‘Moose’. Moose could always recognize Chaney, regardless of the make-up he was wearing. Moose played the werewolf who originally bit Lon Chaney Jr.’s character, Lawrence Talbot, in the original Wolf Man (1941). This picture was taken on the set of Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man in 1943.
  • An alarming new superbug may be on its way — an incurable form of gonorrhea. The disease, once easily killed with a shot of penicillin, is increasingly becoming drug-resistant. Soon, the world may face a version that can’t be killed by any known antibiotic, warned Catherine Ison, the director of the sexually transmitted bacteria reference library with the United Kingdom’s Health Protection Agency.
  • Viewed together, the successive policies tell a clear story. Facebook originally earned its core base of users by offering them simple and powerful controls over their personal information. As Facebook grew larger and became more important, it could have chosen to maintain or improve those controls. Instead, it’s slowly but surely helped itself — and its advertising and business partners — to more and more of its users’ information, while limiting the users’ options to control their own information.
  • It is not the first time Banksy’s art has been fouled in Melbourne. Vandals created another outcry in 2008 when they poured paint over the artist’s stencil of a diver in an old-fashioned helmet and wearing a trenchcoat. That work was afterwards protected by a sheet of clear perspex, although vandals struck again and poured silver paint behind the barrier, tagging it with the words “Banksy woz ere.”
  • Amerikkka runs on big pharma
  • Tatyana is the only woman in the world who lifted 30 pounds with her intimate muscles.”
  • Mr Jani, who claims to have left home aged seven and lived as a wandering sadhu or holy man in Rajasthan, is regarded as a ‘breatharian’ who can live on a ‘spiritual life-force’ alone. He believes he is sustained by a goddess who pours an ‘elixir’ through a hole in his palate. His claims have been supported by an Indian doctor who specializes in studies of people who claim supernatural abilities, but he has also been dismissed by others as a “village fraud.”
  • This crazy break-dancing style looks like it was inspired by a rape re-enactment. The intense screaming and broken table makes this one of the more climactic dances I’ve seen in awhile.
  • He said, “Pam, I want to tell you about an epidemic that’s prevalent in Beverly Hills right now. It’s a buildup of cocaine residue around the cervix and in the vagina. You have it. Are you doing drugs?” “No,” I said, astonished. “Well, it’s really dangerous,” he went on. “Is your partner putting cocaine on his penis to sustain his erection?” “No,” I said, “not that I know of. It’s not like he has a pile of cocaine next to the bed and he dips his penis in it before we have sex.” I had a nauseating flash of one of Richard’s famous lines: Even my dick has a cocaine jones. “Are you sure he isn’t doing it in the bathroom before he comes to bed?” the doctor asked. “That’s a possibility,” I said. “You know, I am dating Richard Pryor.” “Oh, my God,” he said. “We have a serious problem here. If he’s not putting it on his skin directly, then it’s worse because the coke is in his seminal fluid.”
  • ‘From the first moment that I saw him, I knew we would never have a grandmother-grandson relationship,’ Pearl remembers happily. ‘For the first time in years I felt sexually alive.’
  • Prohibition couldn’t have happened without Wheeler, who foisted temperance on a thirsty nation 90 years ago
  • Thanks KS

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Mickey Mouse On Speed

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